It’s not uncommon to encounter individuals through coaching who carry a sense of grief because their dreams have been dramatically delayed. I can meet them where they are, first because yep, that’s what I’m trained to do :) but perhaps more importantly, because I have delayed dreams too.
I’ve actually recently dealt with a situation where I had to prop myself up from the sting of disappointment in realizing that one particular dream was still choosing to play “hide and seek”.
It happens. To all of us.
I know so many brilliant people who face the daily reality of what Harlem Renaissance poet, Langston Hughes calls a “dream deferred”.
In his poem, Hughes asks the question…
“What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up Like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore– And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over– like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?”
As a child, growing up in the proverbial “hood”, I can’t tell you how many times I either heard — or had to recite this poem. It was a staple, particularly during Black History Month.
And as my heart searched for the subject that I wanted to discuss with you today, the memory of the poem arrived before me in perfect order, forward facing, as if uniformed — with a full salute.
It was ready to serve as a reminder of the universal nature of this phenomenon that we must all contend with at some point in our lives.
Maybe it’s the promise of advancement in your career. Or maybe it’s the business that you want to launch. Or on the more personal front… it could be the relationship, the lifestyle, the look, the love… or maybe it’s just … peace.
If you’re here and you’ve made it to adulthood, then, I know that you have a deferred dream looming somewhere. So, the question is what do we do with them?
A few super quick points….
#1: Your evolution and your becoming are more important that the acquisition of your dream. In other words, yes, though cliché, the emphasis is on the journey, not the destination. Life will continue to make your growth the paramount point of it all. So, trust that the delay somehow holds within it the seeds of your own personal greatness.
#2: A dream deferred is not the same as a dream denied. Keep the faith and keep moving forward. Sometimes we have to step back, reassess, go within, create a new plan – and come back again and again. If you feel in your heart that the dream still has your name on it, then follow the guidance you receive on achieving it.
#3: Sometimes, it’s necessary to check in on the essence of your dream and open to different ways that the dream might be fulfilled. Don’t be thrown off by how it’s packaged. Typically, underneath the specifics, are some rather basic desires.
For the most part, we want to… share our gifts and our love, receive love, trust and believe in our own worth and have access to general well-being. And when we think about it, there are countless ways that these things can manifest in our lives.
BUT, if we are fixated on the one way that we’ve dreamt about since we were 3, then, well…. You get the point, I’m sure.
So, please keep these simple truths close to heart and dream on baby. Dream on. :)
As is so often the case, a perfect resource landed at my door today to inspire me and confirm that this was indeed the right message for today. It’s a video that world renown speaker, Les Brown delivered just today as he prepared for surgery. It’s raw, it’s real and though it runs about 30 minutes, I think it’s well worth your time.
Owning Change Quote of the Week:“It is an act of offering our hearts in faith that something in us transforms… proclaiming that we no longer stand on the sidelines but are leaping directly into the center of our lives, our truth, our full potential.” — Sharon Salzberg
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Monica Moody
Monica Moody
